Laser Hair Removal
Face: Part one
I am on a mission to become a sphinx. I curse the day my leg stubble shows up and currently the only place hair (and lots of it) is welcome is my head, brows and lashes. I tried tons of different hair removal methods; from the stinky lotions that smell like perm solution to waxing, to weird infomercial depilatory machines, tweezing, plucking, threading, shaving…you name it and it’s in my arsenal of weapons in the war against hair. Yes, I know hair is natural and serves a plethora of biological purposes but I am a product of my generation where we never learned to embrace the bush. When it comes to my lip and chin I’m a big wuss but for years I gritted my teeth through waxing to keep it smooth.
After a few years, I decided to try a popular at home laser machine that allowed me to control the intensity from 1-5 depending on how zealous I was feeling. Maybe it was because I was in control of the trigger but I was never able to make it past number 2; therefore it came as no surprise that after two years of treatments I was just as hairy as day one. The thing about waxing is that although it’s my preferred method for bikini and brows it requires you to grow out your girl-beard until its long enough to wax. This subsequently made me feel about as sexy as Winnie the Pooh in the days leading up to my big pull. I decided to give lasers another shot only this time with a professional machine and in the hands of someone who wouldn’t flinch right before zapping.
The Soprano Ice machine with specialized cooling tip boasts it ability to help minimize (not obliterate) pain and discomfort with no downtime. What’s cool about his new treatment head is that instead of the old-school method of individual zaps, this head is larger and glides across the skin with a rollerball effect allowing you to cover more surface area in less time. Frankly, I couldn’t care if NASA developed the machine with a trained Astronaut at the helm; all I care about is how much pain I have to endure and the results. I was told to shave beforehand and come in with no makeup or lotion on.
The nurse applied a gel to my face (see picture below) and started along my jawline/chin. It actually wasn’t bad at all. Maybe a few pinpricks here and there but overall the sensation was totally tolerable. I was lulled into this false sense of security when she prepped me for the next phase…the upper lip. For that area she was going to have to switch the laser head to the old version which required individual zaps. No problem, I said…I’m ready, I said…Go for it, I said. I then dropped several F-bombs in front of this nice lady in this professional clinical setting.
Had my upper lip area been any larger I would have blurted out as many expletives as YG’s last album. Yes, that shit hurt like a MF but it was over, literally in less than a couple seconds. I had purchased 6 treatments with 4-6 weeks in between; so far I am on treatment 3 of 6 and let me tell you, it absolutely works. With just the first treatment I noticed my hair texture completely changed. It was at least 50% finer than before. After the second treatment it grew in much slower and much less than before. I will trek on with my last 3 treatments because I’m completely happy with my results. Pain status…soooo worth it.
